Close

Wonderwall

A selection of Phyllis Diller's comic quotes

The Associated Press, Monday, August 20, 2012, 3:38pm (PDT)

A selection of comic lines from Phyllis Diller, who died Monday at age 95:

— "I once wore a peekaboo blouse. People would peek and then they'd boo."

— "I never made `Who's Who,' but I'm featured in `What's That?' "

— "When I told Fang I was going to have my face lifted, he said, `Who'd steal it?'"

— "You know you're old when your walker has an airbag."

— "I was the world's ugliest baby. When I was born, the doctor slapped everybody."

— "They say housework can't kill you, but why take the chance?"

— "I became a stand-up comedienne because I had a sit-down husband."

— "My vanity table is a Black & Decker workbench."

— And actor Dylan McDermott shares this line via Twitter: "One time she came over with a 70-year-old guy. Told me she was `robbing the cradle.'"

Wonderwall Video

  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 23, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 22, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 21, 2013
  • 7 of Rihanna's Worst Looks
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 17, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 16, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 15, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 14, 2013
  • 7 Most Outrageous Gwyneth Paltrow Quotes
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 10, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 9, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 8, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 7, 2013
  • 7 Best Bikini Bods
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 3, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 2, 2013
  • 7 Wonders of the Wall for May 1, 2013
Show Comments
When using Facebook Connect your image and name may display on Wonderwall. All Privacy Settings are controlled by Facebook

More Wonderwall

aa