Halle Berry Tells Why She's Made Bad Choices in MenRelated: Halle Berry, Olivier Martinez
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Berry's rocky relationships are no secret. The collapse of Berry's four-year marriage to baseball player David Justice resulted in a suicide attempt; her second husband, Eric Benet, went into sex rehab and admitted to cheating on her repeatedly; and now she is currently in a custody struggle with her daughter Nahla's father, Gabriel Aubry.
"My picker's broken," Berry tells T about her ability to choose men. "God just wanted to mix up my life. Maybe he was thinking, 'This girl can't get everything! I'm going to give her a broken picker.'"
But now that she's engaged to Olivier Martinez, she says her picker is apparently "fixed now."
RELATED: Halle Confirms Engagement
According to Berry, part of her questionable past choices comes from her admitted low self-esteem.
"Just because they see my face doesn't mean they see me. A person's self-esteem has nothing to do with how she looks," she says. "If it's true that I'm beautiful, I'm proof of that. Self-esteem comes from who you have in your life. How you were raised. What you struggled with as a child."
Her childhood struggles include being raised by a single mother and having a hard time fitting in due to being biracial.
"My mother tried hard," Berry says. "But there was no substitute for having a black woman I could identify with, who could teach me about being black."
"I always had to prove myself through my actions," she recalls about being the lone black student in a nearly all-white school. "Be a cheerleader. Be class president. Be the editor of the newspaper. It gave me a way to show who I was without being angry or violent. By the time I left school, I had a lot of tenacity. I'd turned things around."
RELATED: Halle's 'Dark' Romance
Still, her "humble beginnings" very much affect her today -- even on the night she won an Oscar for "Monster's Ball."
"I always felt like the underdog. Behind the eight ball. I learned not to be too high on the hog," she explains. "Even that night I won the Oscar, I had a fundamental knowing, it was just a moment in time. Driving home that night, back to my house, I felt like Cinderella. I said, 'When this night is over, I'm going back to who I was.' And I did."
Halle is now set to return to the big screen in "Cloud Atlas" after a bit of a hiatus, but just don't call it a comeback.
"I never went anywhere," she says. "I just seized the chance to be in an extraordinary film with an extraordinary cast, exploring an idea that's relevant to everyone."
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