Undressed for Oct. 11: The Week in Fashion Faux PasRelated: Undressed, Christina Aguilera, Jessica Biel, Katherine Heigl, Kim Kardashian, Naomi Watts, Kristen Stewart
- Photo: David Tonnessen/PacificCoastNews.com11 of 15
If you believe the PR spin, Kristen Stewart should be texting only one person, for Robert Pattinson is the sparkly vampire of her dreams, despite her little oopsie with a married man. Let's take a peek at their conversation, shall we?
KS: What's up?
RP: Not much. Just trying to heal my broken heart after you stomped it into a million tiny pieces.
KS: Oh, right, it's time for my daily apology, isn't it?
RP: I'm waiting.
KS: Rob, I'm so so sorry I betrayed you by making out with my director in a Mini Cooper while wearing sweaty gym clothes.
KS: My love shines brighter than Edward's twinkly chest in direct sunlight.
RP: Good. Now, tell me: What are you wearing?
KS: The usual.
RP: Booty shorts, a ratty T-shirt you stole from my dirty laundry pile and unwashed hair?
RP: That's hot. … God, I need to get help and climb out of this shame spiral.
KS: Not until we finish the "Breaking Dawn -- Part 2" promotion, buddy. Now suck it up and meet me later. I have an armpit that needs licking.
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