You Don't Dress With the Lohan: Behold the new "artistic adviser" for French fashion house Ungaro. What can we expect from Lindsay Lohan in her new role (as someone with a job)? Well, she says she wants to take the brand to "a younger place," which is funny considering that her nylon knee-highs take her to a place where "Matlock" is blaring and the Polident is flowing freely. At least the rest of LiLo's outfit doesn't make her look like she's stealing hard candies from Sophia Petrillo at the Shady Pines retirement home, although it still deserves to be put out to pasture. Appropriate accessorizing might have helped here. Her sternum-exposing, tuchus-grazing mini-tunic could use some cutting-edge trimmings like, say, a shirt, or pants, while her combat boots are crying out for a few kicky white flag accents, because any semblance of style has unconditionally surrendered. As for the band around Lindsay's head, it's either protecting a serious head wound (that would explain a lot) or it's holding together the plastic hair the paycheck-needing actress thriftily plucked from little sister Ali's Bratz doll collection.