Just Wondering: Is Tyra Banks a Malevolent Food Dictator?

Wonderwall, Friday, July 24, 2009, 5:27pm (PDT)

The latest sweet morsel from the Tyra Banks Universe of Self-Delusion is the rumor -- which a source recently told Fox News -- that the supermodel-cum-talk show host is trying to drop a few pounds and won't have junk food around her. Even if it's being consumed by someone else! And believe you me, Tyra can sniff that stuff out. Foodar, people.

"She has become so strict with her diet that she can't even stand for junk food or fattening food to be around her," the source reports. "So she's basically telling anyone she eats with what they can and can't order."

Could this be true? If so, are Tyra and Padma Lakshmi in cahoots or something? They both seem to get whatever they want, despite how illogical it seems to that moderate percentage of non-celebrities in the world.

The source continues, "[Banks] tells them: 'If I'm not eating it, you're not eating it!'"

What is this, "The Tyra Banks Show," or Stalinist Russia? And isn't the most essential part of any diet a dose of self-control? I guess Tyra is pretty much obsessed with just about anything that qualifies as one of her passions.

Furthermore, Tyra's been in the public eye so long as a model/actress/television host/singer (well, singer-ish, bet you don't remember thi-is), she should probably have some sort of weight maintenance routine that doesn't include being a killjoy to everyone around her.

Come on, Tyra! We certainly hope this rumor, although it's not that far-fetched, is not true. Don't ruin our image of you as that kooky, yet super *fun* rambunctious TV host. We need to be able to continue to stealthily enjoy those "Top Model" marathons in our underwear without unnecessary pangs of regret.