Wonderwall, Tuesday, December 16, 2008, 9:00pm (PST)
The AP is reporting that 'Man vs.Wild' host Bear Grylls is on his way to Britain to receive medical treatment for a shoulder injury he sustained during an expedition to Antarctica. The Discovery Channel says his trip was not related to the show, but little else is known about what kind of calamity could have brought down a man who has supposedly survived so much of nature's punishment.
We've always privately suspected that Grylls isn't really quite the macho wilderness conqueror he's cracked up to be, so until we get some specifics about his injury, we've come up with some ideas of our own about how he REALLY hurt himself:
1. Fell off the treadmill in hotel gym while reaching for fancy bottled water.
2. Sprained his wrist cutting limes for a nice relaxing Vodka Tonic.
3. Pulled a ligament while handling some Antarctica tchotchkes in the gift shop.
4. Nearly choked on a Macadamia nut truffle from the complementary mini-bar.
5. Rolled off the table during his 90 minute deep tissue rubdown.
6. Allergic reaction to high thread count Egyptian luxury sheets.
7. Sore arm from playing tennis with his snow shoes.
8. Bad sushi.
9. Shampoo in the eye.
10. Severely chapped lips, ran out of his rare Himalayan balm.